How is my child still alive!?
A friend of mine recently had a baby and had asked me about any good new mom blogs, we talked for a bit about what she has been told, read and thinks is good and not so good advice. Wow times have changed haven’t they!?
Being a young mom when I had my 1st daughter and so clueless I must have read every book there was to read on pregnancy, birth and raising kids. I am an only child raised by my mom, grandma and uncles so my mom was not ooberly full of advice and info so I went by what I read. When I had my 1st daughter over 20 years ago there was no internet, no groups or hangouts online, no parenting advice columns, we new moms read real books in real libraries or magazines on grocery store shelves.
I read that breast feeding was good but was not supported in the hospital I delivered, they said formula was better with all the extras breast milk didn’t have(whatever that was!) plus they said it was easier then nursing (which I learned with the next baby was NOT the case!)so I gave up after 2 short months. How was I to know any better!?Hey at least she was born when there was an actual formula instead of the home made stuff from back in the day right!? As far as my next 5, “breast was best” was making its way and was more encouraged as time went on so to follow the good mama standards they were all breast fed at different lengths. I can tell you honestly that I don’t see a difference in breast or formula babies when it comes to MY “all so different kiddos” now that they are older. So for all you formula choosing mamas, no need to be feeling guilty!
No solids till 6 months but you could put rice cereal in bottles to help them sleep better!? Huh… Well of course she had lots of rice cereal in a bottle; they actually made bottles for solid foods so no need to cut the nipples of her regular bottles! Started the rest of the children on solids as they were each ready, and I do believe that I added cereal to all their bottles even when they stopped selling the “solids bottle”. Just an fyi, no allergies in any of my kiddos.
No need to use bottled water tap was fine but you must boil bottles and nipples before use so I did. I must be honest here, I only did this for the 1st few weeks then washed by hand and that’s it. I did however buy the Playtex bottles with the liners (clean bottle every time kinda bottle lol), even if the 1st type had the brown rubber nipple you had to stretch over the top of the bottle and I spilt at least half of the bottles I prepared. Thank goodness for the advance in bottle technology as the years went on. Was a Playtex, Avent and Dr. Brown bottle user. I know now if I had an infant I would be lost without a doubt over which bottle out of the 200 on the baby isle I would use.
Do not let her stand on her legs till 6+ months or she will be bowlegged for life. Let’s face it, trying to get an active 4 month old to stay seated on your lap for long periods of time was not going to happen, so she stood and jumped up and down on every lap that would allow it. I spent the 1st 2 years staring at her legs as she walked to make sure I addressed the pediatrician if I was a glimpse of bow in her legs. By the time I had my 3rd daughter I bought her a jumperoo and exersaucer to exercise her legs by the time she 3 months and guess what, no bow in any of their legs!
She should be woke up at night to be changed and fed. This got me confused with the whole “sleep when baby sleeps” advice so I went with the sleep part. Followed the same with each 1 of the rest of the children, they all seem fine today, at least I don’t think it had any long term affects.
Rub her down with alcohol if she ever ran a temp. I must admit I did this. Didn’t you with your infant!? Although I don’t think it helped much. Never tried this again after the 1st year of my 1st daughters life. I even administered all those recalled cough syrups they do not even make any more, oopise.
Babies slept best when the room was dark and quiet. I was a complete sucker for this advice! Dang this made my life so much harder than it needed to be, but I learned fast with my next 5 children that this advice was a huge no no. The rest of my babies could sleep in the living room with the normal house stuff, other kids, vacuum running etc. Ahh what a blessing! Thank goodness I learned that advice was NO good fast!
Belly to sleep so they didn’t choke if they vomited was stressed in every book I read so I made sure I did that. Good grief how scary now that I think back. By the time I had my 2nd Pampers had “back to sleep” printed on all their diapers and hospitals started teaching this. So the rest were back sleepers till they learned to roll. As a person whose life has been affected by losing a child that even though he was not mine we loved him dearly, to SIDS I cannot stress this enough! Even side sleeping is not considered safe anymore!
Co-sleeping was a huge no. So she was in her crib from day 1. My 2nd daughter as well. My next 4 were all co-sleepers from about 6+ months till they were ready to sleep in their own bed. Confession-my son is 5 and still sleeps with his mama. I know he will soon be in his own bed so I am enjoying this as long as I can. Co-sleeping is not for everyone and I do not suggest it for every family, especially families with newborns. But then again that is only my personal opinion. I have been reading SO many oh so sad stories in the news about infants that lives were lost due to co-sleeping, ugh. SIDS may or may not be preventable but if there is a way to reduce the chances then, do that lots of that, the loss is far too tremendous!
Do not pick up baby every time she cries cause you will spoil her. Let her cry it out. I am a complete sucker for a baby cry! This was advice that went in 1 ear and out the other. My own personal feelings took over and I felt the need to comfort my infants every whimper they made and will do the same for any infant in my care, always. And sure as heck can’t wait to “spoil” the crap out of my grandbabies! They don’t cry to annoy, they need something, even if it is just to be loved and feel close to you. Yes some are a lil more needy than others, so are adults!
The good ole whiskey on teething gums. Can honestly say I never tried this. But am not judging or knocking you if you have or do! Good ole frozen rags, Oragel and teething tabs work just fine.
If she starts to suck her thumb make sure to out hot sauce so she doesn’t keep doing it & have buck teeth. Oh dear, I just couldn’t bring myself to do that. Out of 6 I had 2 pacifiers users that didn’t “abuse” the length of pacifier time and 1 finger sucker that took some time to break but all is good without hot sauce (okay so what if she needs braces in a few years haha!)
Let the TV occupy your child as long as it is somewhat educational. Guilty. Barney, Big Comfy Couch, Sesame Street, etc was always on at our house and yes my 1st daughter spent much of her day walking around singing and dancing to these shows! As more kids came they begin to play more together and outside etc but to this day my youngest who is 5 still loves some PBS and Sprout within reason!
Bite your child back if she bites another child. I think I may have done this but I think it was when I got bit I then lightly bit back. Well maybe not lightly but I know for sure I didn’t break skin! (I am so only kidding!)
I know I missed lots and there is so much more out there, please please share any and/or all the weird, bad, or even good parenting advice you have gotten and either followed or didn’t follow! Can’t wait to hear these!
FYI: Do not follow anything that I did or do with your own babies until you consult your child’s doctor. ALL babies are different.
Mama Bear Plus 6