Has it really been a year?

mama bear plus 6

I am clueless to how a year has passed since my last post here at Mama Bear Plus 6!

The kids and I left WA State and moved to Coeur d ‘Alene Idaho and what another amazing adventure that has been, we LOVE it!

1 daughter has left the nest to start her adult journey.

1 on her way out in just a few months and is heading to WSU to study business, GO COUGS!

I finished my Tamale Therapy cookbook, finally! You can find that here http://cookingtamales.com/

We are adding a new member to the family, my oldest daughter and her husband are expecting their 1st baby, a son, in April 2015 (which is weeks away folks, just weeks!)! This nanna is SO overly excited!! You can read about that journey at http://thenannachronicles.com/

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A lot of life can happen in 1 year! We have been super busy and why I have not just jumped on and posted updates or recipes or pictures… well I will not serve anyone any excuses because we all know that’s all they are. Honestly I just haven’t made time!

Hope this finds everyone amazing and all the things that have taken place in your life in the last year have been wonderful!

Mama Bear Plus 6+

My Tubal Ligation Journey Begins

A tubal ligation “journey”!? Yes I will call it that. I mean have you ever typed tubal ligation into Google!? Good grief! Is there anyone who loves it since having it done? Are there any satisfied customers? No really, I am having a hard time finding any “good” stories! All I can find is posts on PTLS (Post Tubal Ligation Syndrome)  and every other side effect or problem people have had. Which is great and informative if that is the info I am looking for, but it isn’t. I think in my mind I was searching more for the “You will be so glad you did this” or the “You will love it” reassurance that I did the right thing even though I feel I did. I just have to say, I am SO sorry to those of you that have had it done and it was not all good and as you expected it to be! At this time, I can only imagine your frustration.

I am a 37 (almost 38) mama of 6 and I had a tubal ligation and an ablation on Feb 3rd. I have always wanted 8-10 children so this choice didn’t come lightly. It weighed on my heart for a few years. I have spent many hours deep in thought, prayer and in my head battle over making the appointment that would ultimately change my life forever.

For a little TMI: I have always had heavy periods and horrible cramps which I controlled most of the time, between children, with the birth control pill and it worked for the most part. But as everyone knows, especially those who watch TV commercials know there are side effects that come with all drugs, period, so I already knew that I didn’t want to take the BCP forever. And not being in a relationship, married or even sexually active taking  the pill and exposing myself to “effects” wasn’t what I wanted to continue doing long term.

6 years ago when my 6th and youngest child was born and I went in for my 6 week check up my then OB/GYN suggested that I get an ablation done. He briefly explained the procedure, he may have explained it in depth but I am pretty sure I blocked him out the second he said I wouldn’t be able to carry a child again. The fact that it would cure the heavy period and cramping sounded great but never ever having the chance to have another child scared me.

Fast forward thru those years of taking the pill even though I didn’t want to, moving to WA state where my periods basically said “What pill!?” and acted as if I was on none on top of the new diagnosis, high blood pressure, my days of ever taking the BCP ended. Isn’t that what I wanted all along? Isn’t that what I prayed for, a solution to not have to medicate my body? A way to not have to deal with this 2+week bleeding and contraction like cramps?

The research began, a tubal/Esure, an IUD,  a patch, a partial hysterectomy… My options appeared to be limited with the period history so my choices were narrowed down for me. It was a tubal or Esure (which is also a type of tubal where metal springs are inserted in your tubes where scar tissue grows and prevents pregnancy) and possibly a partial hysterectomy. I don’t know about you but inserting metal springs into my tubes didn’t sound very appealing along with all the lawsuits that were attached to stories of people getting this done and research that doesn’t date back very far. Is this that new? Did they just creates something to block the tubes and ask people to sign up to try it!? Yikes! And finding a doc that still does a “regular tubal” also proved to be somewhat of a challenge. Along with only doing a tubal will NOT take care of my main problem, the periods. After hearing a certain docs name come up in several conversations with people and asking my PCP I finally found a great doc that would do a regular tubal and an ablation (which they prefer to do together in some cases to further prevent a pregnancy from trying to attach itself to the wall of the uterus after ablation). He said a partial hysterectomy was not needed and if anything would be a last resort if needed down the road.

Now the tests begin. Ultrasounds, biopsies (AKA crotch saw! OUCH!) and blood work to make sure there were no underlying problems before we proceeded with the surgery. Everything is a go in just 1 weeks time! Is this real? Am I really going to go thru with this? Doc office calls to set the appointment for the surgery, GULP! Am I sure this is what I want to do? Ugh so many doubts but yet so much excitement to get this done and over with. Sleepless nights, tears here and there and LOTS of prayer! Just do it Kelly!

Here goes nothing (or everything!). So grateful to my daughter for taking me there, watching her little brother and waiting for me to bring me back home. Grateful for the kiddos at home that are prepared to help clean, cook and keep an eye on the babes for me while I recover from my 1st (and hopefully last) surgery. Several moments of question while I had my IV set up and talked to all the nurses but I was really just ready, ready to begin this new journey, ready to have 1 less thing to worry about in life, ready to put this behind me. Check in at 9am, surgery time 11am, out by 12pm and on my way home by 1:30pm. 2 incisions on my tummy, 1 in belly button 1 above pubic line. Waking up and realizing it was done and I was still alive allowed for some tears for a brief moment, even though the nurse kept saying crying after anesthesia is normal, it wasn’t from the anesthesia. It was from the realization. Had my throat not been so raw from the breathing tube I would have been able to express that to her, owell, hahaha.

Day 1, SO sore. Dizzy, brain fog, a lil nauseous, hungry, cotton mouth, shaky and so tired. 1st night I could not sleep, had the worst vivid dreams and the worst cotton mouth. Can’t take the hydrocodone their prescribed due to itchiness so ibuprofen it is.

Day 2, getting out of bed was hard, what is this shoulder and neck pain from UGH! No voice, raw throat. SO sore, felt like I would rip the stitches. I so do not do good with anyone touching my belly button much less there being stitches in it, YUCK! Thinking some of the nausea was coming from that. Stairs so NOT my friend… Sore during the day and so foggy headed but restless not able to sit still for long. Trying to gather my thoughts feeling a lil lost. But overall not too bad. Honestly expected to feel worse. Still couldn’t sleep. Insomnia… Dreams… Dizzy…

Day 3, Dear Lord… The worst day so far. Throat still raw. Felt feverish, sore, nauseated, dizzy, couldn’t move and couldn’t sit still. Ibuprofen not making any difference. No appetite. Sad and tearful. Kept thinking about all the mistakes I made in my life wondered if this was 1 of them (WTF!?) Who am I!? Drove for the 1st time today, probably wasn’t the safest thing to do… Sorry other drivers near me when I was going 20 in a 40 thinking I was speeding. Thank goodness it was just up the road.

Day 4, a busy day ahead catching up on all appointments. Feeling better, still sore but controlled by ibuprofen, thank you God! Did WAY too much and felt it by evening time felt sick to tummy and dizzy. Sleep calling my name. Frustrated, just want to feel good again and feel normal. Just want to have energy and umph! Want to be able to bend down and get the laundry out of the dryer, is that too much to ask!?

Day 5, today, Feel SO much better!  Slept so good, whew! Ate breakfast for 1st time all week. Sore, but didn’t take ibuprofen till noon. Getting some work done. Still a lil foggy brained but SO much better than the last few days. Still a lil hoarse but not as sore throat. Feel like I can actually go for a walk, a short 1, but a walk. Stairs are a little easier as well. All in all feel pretty good. (fingers crossed its all good from here!)

This is my journey with this experience. I have been asked many questions before the surgery and several questions now as to how this all came about, why I was doing it and how I am feeling now that it is done so I felt it was best to share it all in 1 place. At this point I have no regrets and feel great about my choice. Based on what my doctor has said, I am where I am suppose to be with the recovery period and maybe even doing a little more than expected at this point. Everybody is different and everyone’s body reacts different! Your doctor is your best bet for advice as he/she knows you and your history and how you should be handling your situation. Contact them right away if something doesn’t feel right.

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Here’s to a new chapter in my book of life! One that I am just beginning and looking forward to seeing how it goes.

P.S. If you have an experience with a tubal, ablation, birth control or just want to stop in and say Hi please feel free to do so!

Update Feb 20th: 2 week check up at doc, all is well. Was told I can resume all normal activities as in baths, sex, and tampons if needed. Incisions are healed. Still having “discharge”, doc explained it to be the uterine lining healing process. Can last 2-12 weeks, oh joy!

Update March 4th 2014: 1 month post-op. I feel great! Discharge done. No period yet. No weird “hormonal” issues lots of other women have talked about, like face break outs, or moodiness. Whew!

Mama Bear Plus 6

 

Finding life, family and work balance

Since I work from home (and currently go to online school) I always hear people say how lucky I am or how lucky my kids are to have their mom home etc. Yes I feel SO blessed to be able to work from home with them and have a flexible schedule (my wish for all parents that want flexible schedules!) I am home to make meals/dinner, to go to school things, to run them to all their appointments, to run them clothes or money when they forget it and the list goes on.

On a side note: I don’t think my teens feel very “lucky” having mom home. No messing around after school, no ditching school, no sneaking people over and any other things teens look forward to when their parents are away. Not that they would do this if I worked outside the home but there is no opportunities to find out hehe.

Working from home is HARD, it is not all fancy and fairytale-ish as some people and media make it seem! With all the things and more mentioned above it is VERY distracting when trying to get things done! There are days and weeks that fly by that I feel like I wasn’t productive at all. And as those types of days and weeks pass, the list of things to do gets longer and income coming in is affected. I make lists, print calendars and create deadlines and it still doesn’t keep the distractions down! From cell phone to laundry to dogs to cats to house phone to emails to doorbell to cooking to trying to keep the house clean to kids kids kids… There are distractions around every corner. There are days when they get the best of me, what can I say, I am only human!

This month (December) (I know, crazy to do around the holidays but cant keep putting it off!)I have started a new way of making my time productive as well as meeting the needs of the house and family. I have a planner now and started literally making “appointments” for stuff that needs to get done, plus using my printed calendars I have created time slots with beginning and ending times not just jotting 6-8 things that I need to get done each day on it. I need to be more disciplined and make time for the “work” stuff and time for the kids so I am not always saying to them that I need to get this and that done before we can go for a walk or before we go on a bike ride or sledding or just laying with them watching a movie and NOT feeling guiltily about doing it and then half the time not getting to do any of it cause it took too much time to tend to 3 things at once while trying to take a call or write a page in my book or get research done for school. I am determined to balance life, work and family and will continue to look for ways to do so as I live and learn. So starting with this and will see how it goes 🙂

Want to share this awesome blog I so enjoy reading! Plus she has GREAT tools & tips for organizing your life!

http://justagirlandherblog.com/how-i-organized-my-whole-life/

My kids are in school M-Fri, except for my son who only goes part time 3 days a week, and I pretty much have time from 8-3pm give or take to be productive so starting here and NOW! I will keep everyone posted as I go thru this new structure and system as I have had several emails asking how I balance it all, so I am admitting to the world that I don’t have all the right answers and I don’t have it all together, yes I am scattered a bit but I am a work in progress! Hmm maybe a great idea for a newsletter!

I suffer from “Guilty Mommy Syndrome”! I feel bad when I can’t give them all my time and attention. I try to live by the moto “Housework can wait, they will only be little once” Buuutt all my work is “Housework”… And this my friends is how I get SO far behind!
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When my son, who is 6, is home on his non school days he has a hard time with mommy not being able to give him all my time and attention so I have found him several workbooks that he works in while mommy works. We also LOVE ABC Mouse! I also used ABC Mouse when I ran a childcare and used it when I taught preschool. I HIGHLY recommend it! And the best part… Try it FREE for a whole month! Guaranteed you will be sold and your kids will love it, just saying 🙂


Here are some planner/organize your life products! I bought and love so far, the “Mom’s Family Desk Planner”

P.S. Do you have any time saving, balancing life/work, get stuff done tips that you can share!? Please please do! We are all opens ears/eyes here!

Mama Bear Plus 6

Dreams can become reality

I was born and raised in Tucson, AZ. I lived there for 36 years, till July 17th of 2012 when I packed up 5 of my 6 kiddos (my oldest daughter would soon learn she too had outgrown Tucson and join her mama along with her then fiancé just 2 short months later) & my 2 labs in my suburban and left behind all I ever known following the moving truck with all we owned in it!

 Tucson, when you get burned out on a place you just know it is time to go & I was burned the heck out. On top of the fact it is not voted to greatest place to raise kids, and I have plenty of those! As for us, we had seen and done it all! Is it a bad place to live? No not really. There are actually people who love it there and will never leave. There are people who have it on their list of places to move when they retire, which is a great idea for those who love the heat and desert!  And even weirder, people vacation there in the summer & never leave the hotel pool!

I was ready for a change! Ready to leave behind the negative memories. Ready to create a new life in a new place with new people. Ready for a peaceful place. Ready for water, lots of water and trees lots of trees! A new beginning!? YES please!

I had been burned out of Tucson for several years but as time went on the urge to go got stronger. Even when I tried to convince myself that I should stay I couldn’t and let’s face it I am good at talking myself into stuff & could not get past the desire to GO! I had spent many hours researching places to move to  over the years that was very family friendly, places that had water, green and trees. Places that had stuff to do, places that had nightlife but not overcrowded with clubs, places that had good schools and affordable living. Places that had NO natural disasters, that it is important you know!

After having a list of 10 I narrowed it down to 5 then to 2. My finals- Colorado Springs & Spokane. How do I choose!? Write them on paper, put them in a hat and draw!? Eeney Meeny Moe!? Look  for jobs in both places and see what happens!? Geez this is hard! As I am praying, contemplating, and struggling with this I decide to start looking for a house. Do you know how scary Craigslist can be!? SCAM City! Found so many nice houses that were attached to scam after scam… Then it hits me! Place my own “searching for house” in both places and see what happens! As I pray God please bring the house that is meant for us in the place you want us to be!  Yes I am a big dreamer aren’t I!? But I can never dream bigger than my God can make happen!

 We received many emails about houses, some scams yes but some real people with real houses in both places. Most not for us but a few that would work.  We got excited over a few and even placed deposits on 2 that fell thru, both in Spokane. Frustration sets in… Maybe He wants me in Tucson. Why would He want to punish me like that!? He taught me patience during those trying months no doubt! Then the email that changed my life came in the early months of 2012! An email from a couple that live in a house and had another house that they wanted to rent out/sell  in a little place right outside of Spokane, Nine Mile Falls. Isn’t the name enough to put a smile on your face!? It just sounds beautiful! After many emails and phone calls back and forth I knew this was it! SO much so I sent my daughter & future son in law to WA to see it & take lots of pictures for me since I couldn’t go due to work (well just being honest, to make sure it wasn’t another scam hehe)

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The week they were there they fell in love with the area, the house, all was a go 110%! My daughter kept saying “Mom this house and area is so you, it is so beautiful, everyone here owns labs, it is somewhere  you will love to no end, you must go! And the kitchen mom, it IS the kitchen of your dreams!” (she wasn’t kidding!) That girl knows me all too well! Spouse at the time lined up a great job offer while I would spend my time working on the business we planned to open there, schools checked out to be beyond excellent, all seemed to just fall into place…

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Fast forward past the crappy next few months of my marriage ending, closing businesses, almost backing out of move (after all what crazy lady would pick up 5 kids and 2 dog and move with no spouse, no job, no plan to a place I had never even visited!), SO many life changes and we are right back to where dreams really do come true! July 17th 2012 we leave “all we ever knew” to a new “all we could ever dream of”!

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P.S. If you could move anywhere, where would you go!? If it is somewhere other then where you live now, what is holding you back!?

Mama Bear Plus 6

Must wear pants and bra for this

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I would never be able to count how many times I have heard people talk about their desire of working from home. Ah living the dream, not having to wear pants if they don’t want to or even a bra hahaha of course depending on what type or work at home field they choose. I ran a home child care for 8 years and yes I wore pants M-F 6am-6pm but I was working from home! I also ran a plumbing company from home virtually and on the phone and if I wasn’t already teaching preschool I could be pants & bra free all day! Truly loved what I did for numerous reasons! Work at home looks different for each individual!  I have also heard a few say that they could never work from home for various reasons. I myself am an entrepreneur, always have been. Whether I work from “home” or not my desire to work for myself runs my life.

 

I am a mama of 6,  #1 was born 20 years ago and with her birth my desire to be with my children every day was born with her. I was 17 when my 1st daughter was (go ahead, gasp, its expected). I had already had my 1st and 2nd jobs by then.

 

The  1st being at Dunkin Donuts and the 2nd at a childcare facility. When she was born I had taken time off from my job and had planned to go back when she was 8 weeks old. My plans were shifted as I dealt with the death of my mother just as I was suppose to return. (You can see more about that hurdle in a blog post on here “I wish Heaven had a phone”) Until my daughter was a year  old I stayed home with her before I returned to the childcare field where I could take her to work and be with her at all times. All this time wondering what kind of business I could start to be home with her and my future children.  I was young and dumb (as they say) I like to refer to it as naive. I had tried all sorts of stuff that I got in the mail from stuffing envelopes to babysitting to answering phones from home. None of this worked out for several reasons, scams and not enough inner drive or self discipline. Fast forward about 12 years & 3 more daughters! During which I went to college for medical assistant, pharmacy tech, computers, worked in childcare and still tried & failed numerous “work at home” scams & offers. None of it stuck, no passion, no drive, no fuel in any of those things aside from working with kids. Found myself pregnant with my 5th daughter and wanted out of the workforce but needed the 2nd income, I wanted to be a fulltime mother and knew there were other mothers that wanted their kids out of daycare facilities and if they couldn’t be with them they would love for another mother to be with them that could and would love them so I decided to open a childcare in my home.

 

8 years of awesomeness! 8 years of loving, nurturing, teaching & caring for numerous children most of which came to me less than 6 months old and stayed till they went to kinder! Many sets of amazing parents that became lifelong friends for which I am beyond grateful for! During the years I worked from home with the childcare I was also able to go school and get my Associates in Business Management. While I was running the childcare my spouse at the time and I also started a plumbing/handyman business that I managed from home which was also a neat adventure! As with any business it had some ups and downs but by far life changing in such a positive way and if I had not outgrown this adventure I would still be doing it. Anyone looking to work from home, love children & to teach, has tons of patience, and a safe environment should certainly look into running a licensed childcare facility in their home!

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With 95% of the children I had in my care going to kinder and knowing that I would have to start with a almost all new batch of kiddos, plus all my kiddos in school fulltime during the day, I chose to close my doors with the childcare (although I kept managing the plumbing company) and step out in the work force once again and put my degree to work as an office manager at a wonderful Alzheimer’s facility where I stayed till my children & myself relocated to WA state (yet another blog post if you want to read about that adventure) I enjoyed working outside the home and met a great team of people but the entrepreneur in me & the drive to help others just can’t be contained any longer!

 

When we got to WA state I knew for sure my plan was to work from home & was not going to pursue anything else but chasing my burning desire to help others and change the world 1 person at a time! We have been here over a year and I have worked from home since moving here along with studying at the School of Online Business and Coaching Cognition to become a life coach and grow my own business and create my own products. Who knew!? So my exciting, well paying, financial freedom, debt free future, chasing my dreams, living life to fullest, dream is all falling in place and coming together  & I truly owe it all the Man above for His guidance in my life every step of the way!

 

P.S. Are you or someone you know looking for a life coach, need some guidance in your life & with your future? You can reach me on Ingenio 🙂 http://life-coaching.ingenio.com/Coaching%20with%20Kelly

 

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Mama Bear Plus 6